There are a lot of different ways to teach children to clean, and a lot of different philosophies on the atmosphere in which a child's participation in household duties should be addressed. However, exploring that overarching topic is beyond the scope of this post. I do think a careful analysis of different strategies and philosophies is both interesting and practical, and as such is an ongoing area of casual study for me. But just for this post, I'm going to share the strategies I have used as a nanny with children aged 5 - 13.
I nanny for more than one family. This family in particular, I've been with for a long time. When the 5-year-old was just under 2 years old, I taught her how to sweep up a pile of dirt. She was interested and wanted to be involved. She learned good attention-to-detail as we swept and re-swept until we got every last bit of dirt from the pile. I was pregnant with Uri at the time, so kneeling down to sweep up the dirt pile was hard for me. Of course I knelt down to demonstrate and supervise as she was learning, but once she got good at it I didn't have to anymore. It was such a relief! I could sweep the floor easily enough, then this helpful toddler would do the last step and save me the discomfort of lugging my heavy pregnant belly up and down to finish the job. 😊 I don't think I ever taught this particular task to Uri, though he definitely helped me with a lot of other tasks.
Now, this picture demonstrates how I taught the kids to sweep the whole floor. (For the 5-year-old and 8-year-old. The older two already knew how). I used a washable marker to draw "lanes", and taught them to sweep lane by lane for their designated portion of the floor. At first, I drew the line all the way across the floor. Then, gradually, I just drew a few inches of the lane as pictured above, and instructed the children to visualize the rest. Then eventually to visualize the whole thing with no lines. This proved to be a very effective strategy for helping them to understand the concept of how to get the whole surface area they were supposed to sweep. And, of course, I tried the marker on a small area first to make sure it would truly wash off as advertised. Don't forget that if you try this! ;)
Now then, about quality control. Some parents or caregivers choose to turn a blind eye to quality control. I feel like that can be an effective strategy, especially if it is a task the child completes regularly. Sometimes just allowing the skill and quality to come over time takes the pressure off and yet eventually yields great results, I hear. Pick your strategy. I did choose to hold a standard of quality control, since these kids are usually earning a reward by doing the chore. I feel like "just because you're part of the family" chores and "earning a reward" chores can be distinct or they can be blurred, but as a nanny I generally handle "earning a reward" chores. As a mother I never really got far enough to see how I would choose to address that distinction, since that doesn't really apply to toddlers. But anyway. I would sweep after the children to "check" their work. If they had left behind a very small amount of dirt and fur, cool, no problem. But if they'd left a significant amount behind, they had to do another small chore (usually matching 10 socks from the laundry) before they could have their reward. To make sure I was being fair and objective, I did a normal sweep and then "checked" my own work, to see how much I generally miss. That is the top picture. It wouldn't be fair for me to hold them to a higher standard than I hold myself, so that's where I drew the line. And with the picture printed out and pinned up, they could see how much of a pile I swept after them and make the objective call themselves if they had to go match 10 socks or if they were in the clear.
There could be a variety of rewards. Whether that means extra allowance, candy, screen time, or what-have-you. It's all about what works for each family. There are always parenting decisions to be made, and of course as a nanny I take my cues from the parents. But in any case, some rewards are "worth more" to children than other rewards, so the chore assigned should be fair for the worth of the reward. A "big chore" should get a more valuable reward than a "small chore". So I also pinned up a general ranking of what chores fell into each category... with some overlap of "medium chores", depending on how dirty or cluttery an area was. Then, also, some of the listed chores had a list of sub-chores, what tasks needed to be completed for that chore to be considered done.
Here are a couple examples of the "sub-chores" to a larger chore. I feel it's very important to have clear communication in all areas of life, and to clearly communicate expectations to other people. Children are people, and their minds work as adult minds works. It gives them a sense of security to know what their options are, to know what is required of them as part of the household, and/or what is required of them in order to earn a reward. Then, they can decide if they're willing to put forth the effort for the reward, or if they're going to go find something else to spend their time doing with self-directed play/reading/activity/whatever. It's very appropriate for a child to be able to make those kinds of decisions, and to be able to "count the cost" if they want to earn their reward. Also, it is right to allow children to voice their opinions and perspective. If I labeled something a "medium chore" that a child felt was really a "big chore", I would always hear them out and seek to understand why they felt it was a big chore. It's important to be fair, to treat people with dignity and respect, and to take their concerns under consideration. Sometimes I would agree and let the chore be classified as a "big chore". Sometimes I would disagree and hold my ground that it was only a "medium chore", but either way I listened closely and cared to hear their thoughts and respect them as the intelligent and valuable people that they are. One of my favorite books on communication and relating to people is "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" by Stephen Covey. My dad first recommended this book to me as a teenager, and it had a powerful influence on my formative years. I've recently rediscovered it, and the refresher has been very good. I feel like the principles it teaches are applicable to any relationship. A parent and a child, a nanny and a child, a husband and a wife, siblings, cousins, an employer and an employee, a coordinator and a volunteer, friends, coworkers, etc. etc. I started this post addressing that there are many different philosophies in regards to the atmosphere of a child's household duties. Let me end this post on a much larger note, that regardless of what philosophy you choose for your household, the principles in this book apply to all human relationships you will ever have. I highly recommend reading it.
Blessings!
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