Contentment Holds Eternal Keys

When I was a teen, I was powerfully impacted by a character in a book series. Captain Timothy Autarkeia from Dragons in Our Midst/Oracles of Fire. Faced with difficult circumstances, Captain Autarkeia spoke of a secret he'd learned. "Contentment holds eternal keys to days of peace which never end," he said.

Wow. That statement became a mantra in my life very quickly. I said it to myself over and over, soaking it in and savoring it.

Contentment holds eternal keys to days of peace which never end.

We all experience disappointments or sorrows in childhood, some more than others. I don't know how one quantifies these things, but I'd experienced enough to know that I lived in a very uncertain world with no guarantees. I knew the taste of insecurity, fear, anxiety, and dashed hopes. Don't we all? But then here came Captain Timothy Autarkeia, speaking of his faith in God and the power of contentment available to a believer, and in one paragraph my world was transformed. Little teenager Jamie was blown away by the security Christ offered, in such a practical and tangible way, as explained by a hero of literature. If anyone had reason to hate his life, Captain Autarkeia did. Yet, by the power of the living God, He was able to live in... contentment. He was able to have days of peace which would never end, regardless of whether his hopes were ever realized. I was so impressed, so enamored, so blessed to know that I am cared for by the same God. No matter the external circumstances, I could yield my inner heart to God and allow Him to create a place of contentment on the inside.

Now I am 29 years old. That epiphany I had was, oh, 12 years ago? I laugh at myself. Am I only 29 years old? Hardly more than a teenager, really. I've only been an adult for 11 years. What a short time. Can this truly be the case? Surely I am at least 80 years old. Surely I have wrinkles and a cane, white hair, and a weather-beaten brow. I have lived enough life. I look back on my teenage self, and surely that happened decades ago. Yet I am supposed to believe that I am only 29 years old? I do not understand the discrepancy between my soul and my birth certificate. I never will. And that's okay.

The lesson of Autarkeia may have captured me in a single paragraph, a single moment, but implementing it has always been an ongoing process. One must live a life of yieldedness to God, and one must understand that emotions are fickle things. Of course the grand idea is to be emotionally content, and that concept is what first captured me. I then learned that sometimes emotions need to be nailed to the cross, wrestled into captivity, disowned, screeched at, ignored, and generally held in submission to Christ with the understanding that they don't always dissolve in an instant. Sometimes the emotional substance of contentment must be contended for. The foundational substance that goes deeper than emotions is far less fickle. I can rely on that being there like, 100% of the time. The emotional substance of contentment is really important too, though. I don't mean to be dismissive. Emotions matter. Cultivating a healthy emotional environment in the inner place matters. And we can't do that in our own strength. 

Let me quote the scripture that Captain Autarkeia referenced:

I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. - Philippians 4:11-13

I can do all things through him who gives me strength... It's about contentment. And the emotions are part of that.

Here are some other scriptures that I've found over the years. In my old Bible, I definitely had Philippians 4 and Habakkuk 3 written in the margins of each other:

Though the fig tree does not bud

    and there are no grapes on the vines,

though the olive crop fails

    and the fields produce no food,

though there are no sheep in the pen

    and no cattle in the stalls,

yet I will rejoice in the Lord,

    I will be joyful in God my Savior.

- Habakkuk 3:17-18

There is a lot of emphasis on God being our provider - Jirah, the one who meets our needs. That is correct. That is who He is! Yet, what if our needs are not being met? (Physical needs, emotional needs, etc.) Well, first, we should make sure we are living our lives completely yielded to Him. Sometimes we sabotage His blessings on accident. But even when we are completely yielded... if our needs aren't being met... what then? This is a bitter pill to swallow, and human nature is quick to blame God. And it's okay to acknowledge that. God wants us to be very real, honest, and raw with our emotions to Him. But He also asks us to stand on a firm foundation beyond that. He asks us to rejoice in Him, to be content in Him, even if we are hungry. Even if God hasn't provided. That's a really tough ask, God. Is that what this yieldedness thing is all about? Is this what it means to be humble? What type of strength does it take to trust you even when you're not coming through for me? Have I surrendered my very sanity if I still choose to trust you when you're not delivering?

Surrendering oneself to God is a deeply significant thing. At the end of the day, though, having God is better than being alone. We all have that God-sized hole in our hearts... and at the end of the day, only God can fill that hole. So long as God provides HIMSELF to me, I can live with Him not providing other things. And Him providing Himself is the one and only guarantee. I can live with that. Even if all my hopes and dreams are dashed, still I will have God to fill the empty places of my heart, and He is the one thing I can't live without. So it is indeed well, that He is the one thing that is completely guaranteed. So I will accept whatever circumstances I must endure in this temporary time on earth, and I will accept complete surrender to God whether He "comes through" for me or not with the things I want and need on this earth. And the strength to accept this comes from Him, for I do not have such strength in myself. God resists the proud, but gives grace (divine strength) to the humble. So I will be humble. This is the path to life. This is the path to contentment - which holds eternal keys to days of peace which never end. 

Some more scriptures to take note of:

The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly. - John 10:10

I always find this verse highly encouraging! Despite the heavy message of Habakuk and Philippians, let us never forget that God's will for us is abundant life! And He is Jirah, He does provide. There are two sides to the coin, and we should never get so focused on one side that we forget the other. Let no one despise the "prosperity gospel" in its entirety, for God does desire prosperity and abundant life for His children. We do need to be on guard against false teaching, yes, and often those who preach the "prosperity gospel" ignore the other side of the coin and end up in some false doctrine, but let's not throw the baby out with the bathwater. God likes abundant life, both on the inside and on the outside.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” - John 16:33

We will have trouble in this world. Dang. There should be no surprise there, Jesus told us, straightforward and simple. He didn't pull any punches. He isn't causing us the trouble and the trouble isn't His will for us, but He wanted to give it to us straight. That's just the way it is. In this world we will have trouble. BUT! We should take heart, for He has overcome the world. There's that contentment again. Taking heart.

In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. - 1 Thessalonians 5:18

I'm probably beating a dead horse, but just in case anyone doesn't know, I will point out that this verse says in everything give thanks, not for everything give thanks. We're not giving thanks for bad things... we're finding good things we can still give thanks for even in the midst of trouble or bad things. I always think back to laying exposed in the cold after the fire, and I'm thankful to have skin covering my body, warm clothes, food, clean water, all the basics. I can dwell on what I don't have and my many sorrows... and I do, sometimes, because healthy grieving matters. My son matters. The babies I lost matter. My womb matters. There is much that I lost that I grieve for and that matters. I once heard a widow preach about how Eve was so focused on the one thing she couldn't have, that it ruined the garden for her. The widow compared her late husband to that, the one thing she couldn't have in her garden, and how she shouldn't focus on that. I see the metaphor she was trying to make, but honestly, I was kind of offended that she compared a dead loved one to the forbidden fruit in Eden. I know I took the metaphor somewhere she never meant for it to go, some things aren't meant to be taken to their logical conclusion, but that's still where I went with it. I'm not judging that widow or implying that she doesn't have healthy grieving habits, I'm just saying that the metaphor, taken wrong, would lead someone to shun their grief like a forbidden fruit. Perhaps that's why I'm emphasizing that focusing on grief matters. Two sides to every coin. If you have lost loved ones, or are going through some other pain in life, please grieve well and please grieve as often as you need to. But at the same time, don't neglect to dwell on the things you can be thankful for as well - for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. ;) I am thankful for my garden. My morning glory flowers and vines. I'm thankful for Jacob, for friends, for family. I am thankful for audiobooks, for good stories. I'm thankful for warm blankets and mugs of hot chocolate. I'm thankful for my car, for marco polo, for watercolor paints, quiltwork, and post offices. There's a lot to be thankful for, and that feeds into cultivating an environment of contentment, that feeds into bringing the emotions into line too. Sometimes my emotions baulk at the thought of being thankful, under the staggering weight of grief and loss, and that's okay. I can still be thankful even when my emotions aren't on board. And choosing thankfulness without emotion paves the way for the emotions to be more accepting the next time.

In conclusion, I want to share another book that has impacted me. Of course, Captain Timothy Autarkeia is the framework the Lord originally used to deliver this message to me, and He's driven it home with scriptures and His direct voice over the years. It has long been a soapbox for me: I can be content because of an internal reality, regardless of external circumstances. Recently, I listened to this audiobook, Holy Hygge. I was so impressed! The author preached my soapbox better than I could preach it myself. She hit all the relevant scriptures, I don't think she omitted any of my go-to verses. The book has, oh, maybe 7 chapters total; and one entire chapter is devoted entirely to the topic of contentment from a biblical standpoint. It was such a breath of fresh air. This whole book was, I highly recommend it.

Blessings.